the story of us... the end of us

the story of us... the end of us


so i guess that was it.
it's like it all ended, before it really began.
when i think back, it's so hard for me not to regret anything. someone once told me, that regrets do not get you anywhere. i see... most of us really just regret our mistakes and without them we would never really learn...?!

it's a few months ago now i met daniel.
we talked a lot, and it all went weel, at first.

in the beginning i did not like him, he was so... everything he did was wrong, and the way he would not leave me alone everytime i said no...
but he was nice, in his own speciel way, he could always make me laugh.

there was something about him i guess.
he tried for a long time and when he finally got me to fall in love with him, he gave up... maybe he never really understood what i wanted?!

sadly it's really over between us. i still hope that he will change his mind, but as time goes by, my hope of getting his love becomes smaller. he was the first one i have ever been in love with. who knew it would hurt so much? i did not.
it's been 6 weeks now and i have accepted that it's over... but i still hope, i still cry and most of the time i live in an other world, where we are together, it makes it easier, when i don't have to face reality all of the time.

I think that i could move on if i wanted to, but then again not really. i could go on... but my heart would stay behind with him along with all og my hopes of love and i would not let him go... i can't, really i have tried. it's not working for me.
sometimes i think back on the happy and fun times i spent with him... and it only make me cry and i know that i will never have him back. and whenever i see him i miss him.
i think about all of the time. and i have now reached to limit to how much i can take...

i want this to stop now. it's to hard. i love him and miss him and i will for some time... but now it's time to move on like he has. why can't i leave with that?

faith sometimes have a funny way to teach us things... i sometimes wonder why i was suppose to meet him, and he made me fall in love with him. why?

i have learned so much of this, next time i will give who ever comes along a fair chance from the beginning, if i had done that this time we would have had a chance.

why did i just kiss him when he wanted to, i wanted too. i just never made him see that.

the thing i think is most unfair is that i did not ask for this. you wanted my number, and when i said know you wanted one more chance...
why was i the only one in fall at last!? it does not seem fair, does it?

maybe i do not deserve him.
i hope you find happines with someone else.
and i hope you know i still care.
i guess that is just the way it goes sometimes...